Self Love: The Foundation of EVERYTHING

A beautiful image by Jeronimo Sanz, using two portraits of a man suffering from Parkinsons Disease. This image represents the triumph of courage over self pity and suffering.
A beautiful image by Jeronimo Sanz, using two superimposed portraits of the same man suffering from Parkinson’s disease. This image represents the triumph of courage over self pity and suffering.

I have come through the other side of my monster invasion of a few weeks back.

Funnily enough, it was not only me who was experiencing such an intense monster occupation and inner earthquake. Seems, from my friends around the world who are also on a path of awakening, that these past few months have been a time of volcanic shake ups for many of them.

We are in the midst of a global consciousness shift that has been happening for years now but suddenly things have shifted up a gear. We are into overdrive.

That’s what happens when lessons keep on coming at you but you don’t get the message. The universe steps it up and may deliver a mighty slap in your face so that FINALLY, you will get it. Message delivered and AHEM – goddamnit – received already!!

That’s what happened to me when I went on my adventure on the wheel of Samsara in France, ostensibly to see my ex-boyfriend and find out WHY he left me with my heart ripped to shreds and bleeding all over the place, but actually – this trip turned out to be an investigation into my man relating patterns.

And the interesting thing about any relating patterns that manifest in the external world, is that they are just a mirror of your internal relating patterns, with yourself. Your primary relationship is actually with yourself. This may seem paradoxical at first – how can you have a relationship with yourself if you are only one person? But it is the truth. Our main job in this world is getting to know ourselves and understand ourselves, and eventually (hopefully sooner rather than later), love ourselves. This, as I have known all along but really felt viscerally in the past few weeks, is the key to everything.

If you don’t really love yourself, your life will feel like it just doesn’t really work.

And if you actually have some self hating patterns embedded deep down in your psyche, your life will really not work.

You will have all sorts of problems, with relationships, with money, with work, with everything basically. Because as a result of your self hatred, self sabotage will be undermining everything you do.

Your monsters will be running your life, sitting there on your shoulder at all times, running a constant commentary along the lines of

“oh, so you think you are going to do that do you? Ha ha, you are funny…. because you know what, YOU SUCK!!!! And everyone KNOWS you suck!!!! Ha ha ha ha.”

When you have an internal dialogue like this (or perhaps not this bad but along these lines), it is very difficult to make progress in your life because you have an internal conflict going on. First you have to fight the battle inside, and then you show up for the external world.

But even if you win the battle with the monsters, when you are done you are going to be bruised and beaten, and not in the optimal state to come out and claim your glory and shine your light for others.

Self Love and Self Worth

Of course self worth is intimately connected to self love. If your self love is lacking, your self worth will be lacking, and it will be hard for you to claim what is rightfully yours just by being born on this Earth: that is, your abundance in every sphere of life, and your personal fulfilment and joy. For me one of the most amazing things about my journey in my own business (yes, this Global Yogi Inter-ship!), has been the self knowledge gained along the way. In particular I have recognised a very deeply embedded belief that money comes from ‘jobs’. This is a belief programmed in by society and family (with no malicious intent mind you), which, if you are running your own business, will manifest as a big abundance and income blocker. And it’s a belief which I never would have identified had I not embarked on this journey.

Essentially, we are all universes. We contain worlds. We are made of the same elements as the Earth: water, fire, earth, ether, air. We have seasons, we have seas, we have mountains and valleys within us.

Our inner worlds need to be in harmony in order for our outer experience of the world to be in harmony. We need to shine our light into our darkness and love every thing that we find. We need to accept absolutely everything that we find, all the parts of us: the wounded child; the angry adolescent; the rejected twenty-something; the one that is lost; the one who is afraid; the one who is a little crazy and impractical and throws the house out the window (a Spanish saying which I love – ‘tirar la casa por la ventana’). We need to love everything that we find. We need to embrace the fearful parts of ourselves.

We need to care for the wounded parts of ourselves. We need to deeply love the parts of ourselves that feel they are not good enough. We need to wrap a big cloak of warm love around all of these parts. And we need to do it daily.

Self love is a daily practice.

Like anything, the more you do it the better you get at it.

And then you start to notice the changes in your external world.

When you fully love and accept yourself without judgement, it comes naturally that you love and accept others in the same way. And thus, your relationships improve. When you fully love and accept yourself, you don’t have any driving need for love and acceptance from others, because you have already received that gift from yourself. And so, when love does come your way, you can just enjoy it, instead of grasping it like a drowning sailor stranded in the ocean grabbing onto a life raft because she went out to sea without her boat.

The thing which is truly amazing though about this revelation (that self love is the foundation of EVERYTHING) is that in order to heal our external lives, all we need to do is look inside.

We don’t have to strive and effort and strain to fix all of the supposed problems that we see in our external world. We don’t even have to leave the house. We just need to focus inside though meditation and slowly bring light and awareness to our darkness as we love ourselves more and more each day. With the love then comes appreciation, instead of having the monsters on our shoulders telling us how ridiculous we are, we have a new voice, that is telling us that we are great. The monsters of course will always be there, hanging around somewhere, but their voices will be quieter because we care for and love and accept them and don’t try to banish them to the lands of Nothing. Because they are a part of us too.

Without beefing ourselves up or comparing ourselves with others, that kind voice just says kindly, wow – you are GREAT!

And when you start hearing that internally more and more, it will start showing up in your external world. People will start showing you appreciation.

Heal Yourself and You will Heal the World

One beautiful story I read somewhere a while back goes a bit like this. There was a renowned healer in a mountain village, which people would come to see from far and wide with their ailments, and he would magically cure them all, from the common cold through to cancer and terminal diseases. Nobody knew how he did it, because he didn’t treat the patients. They just came and told him their ills. When asked what his process was, he answered, ‘Oh I just look inside of me to find which parts of myself I have not loved enough. And I love them.’

Heal yourself and you will be healing the world. Love yourself to health and happiness and you will be loving the world. Miracles will occur. I guarantee it.

Need s helping hand in this Self-Love business? I have got you covered :). I created a 30 Day Email Journey to Self-Love especially for you! In this course, delivered each day for 30 days, I will share with you stories of my own journey to loving myself, and each day I will give you a practice designed to grow your self-love. The goal is that you be able to take away from the course a series of daily practices that are the best fit for you, so that you are then your daily doses of self-love will begin to exponentially increase your happiness and satisfaction in life. Ready?

Buy the course from the SHOP and start growing your self-love tomorrow.

30 Days of Self Love

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